Wedding Trip to Pakistan

So they said it couldn't be done - we would have to rush and struggle. But no- I stand (sit actually) before you defiant and proud of my achievements. 

yeah yeah, I shopped - A LOT! 

We set off in such a rush as usual with mum being ultra stressed out. After check in, my aunty, mother and I decided to actually relax and have a round of hot drinks to mull over what the next 6 days may hold for us. It was unanimous that we would struggle for time and should aim to spend the bulk of our time in Lahore. Up the escalator and over to our gate, mum abandoned me for an old school friend which left me alone with my blackberry - how sad?! 

Flight was good, food was okay and we landed in a mildly warm Lahore. After the mess of Lahore customs (Karachi is much better imo) we waited for our family friends driver until we realised that as we had a flight for Bahawalpur the following day, we were entitled to a nights stay in a hotel. Great! (Mum said) we wont have to step on anyone's toes and can go shopping wherever we liked. 

Sunset as we left Manchester

En route to the hotel, we discovered an elder couple (also in transit) were old friends of my inlaws-to-be and basically decided to adopt me. The Aunty, bless her, kept praising my MIL and said that I was a lucky girl indeed. 

Super funny Punjabi drama that Aunty and I got addicted to!

Then began the hunt for the lehnga! I had my wedding planner, printouts of designs I liked and my laptop for showing close-ups of embroidery I wanted to hand.

We.went.everywhere. Maria B, HSY, Karma, Think Pink, Zahra Ahmed, Designers, Zardosi, Saleem Fabrics, Liberty Market and even Anarkali. By mid afternoon I was so exhausted and in despair... I kept telling mum I wanted to go back home and forget this. It was so frustrating as nowhere had the right amount of elegance or intricacy in kadai and yet not be completely unaffordable. 

Maria B was nice but her bridal designs seemed outdated and not on trend with colours for the shaadi day. Zardosi seemed nicer at first but then I realised that prices were 3-4K for 'non-designer designs' that could be easily copied. Karma seemed the same for me too. Mum decided it was worth having lunch and then trying Sana Safinaz, Mehdi and the more out of the way designers in Lahore. Just as we were driving to my favourite place to eat, I saw a designer boutique and was forced mum to check it out.

The rest is history... LOVED LOVED LOVED this place. Knowing my audience (wink wink) I dont want to give the name and style away of the designer - but it was just so me! She was elegant yet modern, had great quality of fabrics/kadai with exquisite colour combinations. I fell in love with one particular ensemble and gave it try - my mum went into shock.  :o

After a quick lunch we went to officially order the bridal, gave an advance of 1 lakh (this place is not cheap but boy, do I think its worth it!) and left with the largest grin ever!! 

Chillin out, maxin in Lahore's English Tea House

With still a few hours of shopping time available, we bought some threads and motifs fabrics and headed back to the hotel. After a chicken jalfrezi, accompanied by Madonna's Frozen, I truly KO'd and dreamt of my lehnga. 

The next day we flew to Bahawalpur and were picked up by my Father and Mamoo. A quick stop off at my Uncle Munir's (a relative as well as my Dad's friend from med school) to pick up Aunty Taiba for browsing. 

We had to abandon the car and rikshaw into the bazaar, so much fun!

In short- for party wear, designer copying and formal outfits - Bahawalpur kicks ass. In particular a shop named Wahad. They have everything in this little cubby hole, I ordered Faiza's and Aunty T's wedding day outfits as well as my chief bridesmaid's. 

Wahad's in Bahawalpur

After visiting a peacock themed restaurant, we then drove the 3 hours to Rahim Yar Khan; all the while roaring with laughter to Mamoo's Indian travel stories! This continued after arriving home when Nanaji joined us and backed Mamoo's apparently unbelievable stories up.

That evening, I spent all of 5 minutes with Dad discussing that wed drive to Lahore on Weds morning to get 2 days of designer shopping done- however this did not exactly pan out. 

We ended up not heading back to Lahore as early as we'd planned due to Mum suffering a fever. It wasn't that severe that we couldn't travel but I certainly wanted her to rest as much as possible. We spent 3 nights in RYK which was actually lovely. That feeling of being home, wandering off to see old friends and having food that I love made by our cook was great. We gave some odd bits of sewing to the darzi and spent quality time together as a family. 

Having french toast in bed - ahhh!

We decided it was worth an afternoon shopping expedition back to Bahawalpur to order a few of the partywear outfits for me. And we did exactly that on Wednesday afternoon! I ordered a navy velvet outfit and a gorgeous Elan copy - a light green frock with heavy work. Im looking forward to how that turns out just as much as my lehnga. Inshallah it should all be great!

The last night was spent with Rano giving me a maalish- her hands are actually really soft but always very rough with me and I end up in more pain after! But its totally worth it for the amazing nights sleep. 

Rano and Mohd Ali

The last day was slightly emotional as some people got upset over how it was the last time Id be in Pak before I married. I didnt really get sucked in until I realised that wow, they are right... and in about 3 months, the wedding will be around the corner. Scarey stuff! 

Baji Saima and Amna Noor

Anyway, we flew from Rahim Yar Khan back to Lahore and spent the last evening having a lovely dinner before our flight back to Manchester.  

All in all, I got everything done as Id planned within the 5days in Pakistan and yes- Ive surprised myself. Inshallah, I hope there are no problems with the orders, especially the lehnga from Lahore as I couldn't go back to sort things but after meeting my designer at the airport (unplanned)- she ensured me that everything should go well! :D

MAC Lipsticks

Believe it or not, Im not really into make up- a good skincare regime should do the trick. But now as ma-ria-age looms, Im thinking a lot. I usually go for a nude-ish look with Nars chihuahua lipgloss, Benefit No 10 blush (awesome stuff- has a two tone effect that compliments high cheekbones) and any eye shadow. A la following picture: 

But then I became adventurous...

It all started last year when I walked into the MAC counter and asked for some advice on concealers. My bags were really playing up and I looked like a raccoon. The assistant pretty much ignored what I said and asked if I'd ever tried a red colour for my lips. Cover up and lip colour.... even I know they have nothing to do with each other but heck, let the expert go on. She tried on a few vampy reds, some berries and then Ramblas Red. I was hooked... a lovely bluey red with pink tinges which seemed to draw gasps from a few girls around me. (Not MAC employees may I add) I felt like a princess and I knew if I'd ever go for a red - this is the one. 

I've worn it 2/3 times straight on and even developed a dab pattern technique with a lick of Nars lipgloss to add a sheen.

 Ramblas Red MAC Lipstick

Bad Education

Chihuahua Lipgloss
 

So that's my usual style plus a few pops of colour. Owing to the fact Ive tried something different, when going out somewhere nice, I would think something wow for my wedding day. I could leave it in the capable hands of my make up artist (the lovely Mus) but I want to be sure that the colour suits me on the day. A lot of it does depend on my outfit and I should probably wait til then but Im not going til another 3 weeks and I only have the time now. Plus the MAC lady says that a lip colour is usually universal and will normally go with any wedding outfit. Best thing is to get a few options ready and then decide.

So what are the choices?

Fresh Moroccan was the lipstick of choice at a recent family wedding, a browny red with gold flecks. Should be perfect however upon research it is far too deep a colour for me. I felt it didn't suit my complexion and indeed my lip shape.

Fresh Moroccan

In the bullet

Another option would be to go for a girlier berry shade, I really loved this colour. A huge negative was that it had zero sheen on my lips- most probably because I don't have the shapeliest, plumpest of pouts and I need quite a glossy colour. Shame as the colour was indeed lovely.

Odyssey

After seeing that some berry reds seemed to do the trick I pursued into the cream sheen avenue... came up with 3 options. Dubbonet is quite dark on me but with a burgundy lehnga it may go really well with the entire look. I would probably have to tone down the eye make up as well to balance out the face.

Hot Tahiti was a gorgeous deep dusky pink and I would definitely go for this if I get a ruby tinged outfit.

Runaway Red is going towards more reds like a tomato or fire engine. And we all know how I feel about these shades!

Dubbonet

Hot Tahiti

Runaway Red

The Engagement

If you're on this blog, you know me well. And if you know me well then you know all about Umar and I and how the mangni was. So I won't bore you to death with all the details, just a select few.

• My brother, Hamid had booked his flight to Prague for the evening of my engagement. The night before, his passport magically disappeared and consequently we spent the whole night (much of the morning) looking for it. When I should have been having a shower, getting ready with tasalli - I was on my hands and knees looking in every nook for his passport. I have to say, for a long while, I have saved Hamid's derrière many a time by picking locks, breaking open the filing cabinet, finding paperwork etc but this time - I had bigger fish to fry. We gave up about 30 minutes before Umar's family arrived. (We eventually found it tucked behind the sideboard and Hamid, cleverly, blamed it on the kids)
• Consequently, Mum had a major migraine all night and morning leading to flower arrangement Inspector Clouseau style. She wore a massive jacket, even bigger sunglasses but still smashed it in my opinion. Our lounge looked like some florist fairy sprinkled magic dust and transformed into the mangni grotto. It was beautiful.

Mum did an amazing job!

I can't believe actually how organised we were.
All glasses were filled, plates stacked, fruit cut and laid out.
Tag team Siddique and Saeed were indeed on form. 

The weather was beautiful and our street looked amazing :)

Not bad considering it was a 10 minute home jobby.
Having said that the outfit more than made up for it.

The worlds longest stairs- I was basically prodded down!

• I can't actually describe how nervous I was. I peeked outside the window and saw the number of cars parked and deducted a 'full house'. I won't go into the panicked expletives racing through my mind as I was poked down the stairs. It wasn't too bad after all actually. 

Umar's nephews gave me a rose each which
couldn't have pleased me more. Such cuties!

Mum and her usual nervous banter. Which finger Umar?
You can see Abu, Aunty T and I trying to control our laughter.

• I don't actually know what Mum was playing at here. It seemed to me that she got confused about which hand to place Umar's ring on and what made it even more comical was how she started doubting herself and I had to intervene and be like mum, 'its the left hand!'

Aunty T gave me a beautiful gold set (which I had chosen from the shop)
on the day and discreetly asked me to act surprised. I kinda did?!

Let the hacking commence...

• After someone cheekily brought the cake out, I thought I'd take charge and try to serve everyone as I usually do. Big mistake- the cake was so huge and dense with fruit that it almost resulted in a hacking type procedure. Thank goodness Baji Fozia came to rescue me!
• Oh and another thing I forgot to mention- Umar's family came back a second time as we forgot to lay out the mithai. I personally think Umar just wanted seconds of the AMAHZING cake. tsk tsk :P

My Girls

I met these girls in the first year of University and I can say for sure they are here to stay. A trip to Leeds, 2 days ago, affirms how dear these people are to me - all of them travelled to see each other and that kind of effort is hard to find in our busy lives. 

A wedding, a baby and 4 graduations later - we are as thick as thieves. 

From L-R - Sania G, Me, Raabiah, Harman, Sabah, Saira M

12 years - gone in a blink

In 1999, Haris Saeed was born in Fairfield Hospital, Bury.
I remember hearing of my mothers pregnancy and crying at the thought of another sibling taking my special place. (yes, I was a complete brat)

How wrong was I? Haris was the phenomenon in my life that matured me in such a way, that I can now safely 'mother' everyone around me, be it Sabah, Abeer or indeed Khadeeja- I just cant help it.

This Wednesday gone, Haris was exactly the same age as I was, when he was born. I took him for his favourite meal and treated him to a dessert too. I watched him giggle and squeal as he blew his candles out and I flashbacked through all the years he has lived: Ive changed so much as Haris has grown so much.

I am so proud of my kid brother; he really is a smart, gentle hearted boy and I wouldn't have him any other way. Haris is the one thing I will miss daily in my new life as a married woman.

May Allah (swt) guide him throughout his life and bless him in all ways possible. Ameen.

Aged 6 on a trip to Islamabad

Aged 12 at the Trafford Centre (21/09/11)

Zainab Sajid and other extortionists.

Today was the first day of my new course and we got a two hour lunch break. My partner in crime and I decided, this called for a Jaffa chicken schwarma and we pretty much devoured it within 20 minutes. What to do now? Let's browse some of the shops on Wimmi Road.

First stop, Farooq Fabrics. Ah trusty Farooq- if you want giving, taking suits (the lena dena type) - Farooqs never lets you down. Didn't see anything special there today. Checked out Alankar, Burooj (I heart Chinyere and Bareeze- what the heck, Im a simple kinda girl!) and then checked out Je'Roche. 

Ive known of this outlet for a while but never really got the chance to have an actual gander. It's a nicely set out shop with a bridals section downstairs. All the formals are set out in designer names - Asifa & Nabeel, Fahad Hussayn, Lajwanti etc. I saw one okay outfit which could be used for a mehndhi outfit but Abeer assured me it wasn't all that. 

We quickly got bored with the upstairs and asked if we could pop downstairs. The attendant first said 'no, appointments only' and then checked with her boss and let us through. I'd like to first comment on this letting through business. At no point did I seem desperate or that bothered that its appointment only, I'm sure they only do this to fake an air of exclusivity. No point really, if you don't let people through to see your stuff- you aint gonna sell it love! (rolls eyes)

Anywho- as we walked down the stairs I noticed a Sonar display of gold plated bridal jewellery. Some pieces were very pretty actually but again, the attendant needlessly commented on how 'no one wears real gold these days'. I think she meant this towards me in a, 'don't worry- no one can afford real gold sets these days so why don't you consider this super alternative?' way. **

I went downstairs and it turns out that a designer was there with a client. Another bride, also called Saira, was just trying on this very beautiful outfit and admiring herself in the mirror. It was a lovely, light sea green with shadings of deep blues and greens. She looked great. I complimented her too. As did the owner- many times. This kind of 'pressure complimenting' by designers and shop owners washes over me - I find myself doing the squinted frown 'well, you would, wouldn't you?!' but if Saira likes it, Saira seemed the type to buy it. 

I introduced myself to the owner, said Im getting married, heading to Pakistan and was looking for a lehngha. I also mentioned how I knew that a fashion show took place last night and that I couldn't go. She told me that it was okay and by far, Zainab Sajid's collection was amazing. Yes- the woman standing right next to her was Zainab Sajid. I knew of her but didn't really pay her as much attention as compared to Bunto or HSY or Maria B (I like to class them as the out of the world inaffordables). 

She spoke of styles with me, how long is still in and no matter how simple I want to look - I have to look the bride. I mean okay, I should look the bride but surely my gold jewellery, heavy make-up, dupatta on head setting with a massive bouquet would also set me apart from the guests. I politely carried on the conversation and got on to the talk about budgets. 

-I love how designers ask so sympathetically about your budget and you, hoping not to offend by undervaluing their talents, still overshoot your budget and carry on the pretence that you might order-

 I did the same- I said my budget was £2000. Yup, I can hear you. Nope, I'm not crazy. I think I said it just to see what she'll say and guess what? 

'well, we can certainly tone it down and make it according to your budget. To a minimum of £3000' Oh lord I thought - GET OUT! WHILE YOU CAN!

and so I did.

What is going on Pakistan?! I've come to terms with HSY and even Bunto (who by the way, gets her fabrics from Rainbow Textiles in Southall and they sell chiffon at £150 p/m) but you- Zainab Sajid, whom I didn't even consider a proper designer. Some fledgling yuppie who blatantly started this from a hobby and now you think you can charge 2 grand for a dress. A dress Ill wear for 3/4 hours max. A dress that I may never wear again. A dress that will probably pinch and bruise me with its weight and crazy embroidery. No - thank you. My Father has worked far too hard for you to take maybe 6 months worth of takings. (Please bear in mind that Dad's hospital is mostly charity based)

I don't really have a grudge against Zainab Sajid in particular but I'm so surprised that there is a market for these severely overpriced outfits. Sure, they are beautiful and non-designer really doesn't compare but I just cant part with that much money. It really isn't worth it to me. And I know my parents will probably be shocked at my view (as I fully support fare trade chocolate and am against the practice of sweat shops) but in a country where the usual salary is so so low, how can spending lakhs of Rupees be justified. I'd rather look simple, elegant (probably cheap) but not wasting a ridiculous amount of money that could be invested in more guests or a better menu. I know that the ethical fashionistas attribute much of the cost to the quality of fabrics and worksmen being paid the 'correct wage'- but surely when it's about £500 from a RYK tailor to £3000 for a designer- Id call this extortion!
I should also add that frugality is definitely called for in my case especially as I am the eldest and we, as a family, have many responsibilities.  

Having said that, I fully intend on my day being a special one, with all the people I love dressed immaculately. Yup, I'm designing everything! :)

Here's a quick video that showcases outfits from 2 lakhs to even 5/6 lakhs. Enjoy, because that's all the designer you'll ever see with regards to me!

** Surely, it makes more sense to buy and wear real gold as it still retains in value. In fact, with gold rates increasing more and more - I'd make money. (Not that I plan on selling the family jewels!!) This notion also coincides with my ethos of 'nothing fake on the day'. 

Some examples of brilliant photography